hardly knew me yet you felt for me.
met me for coffee wanted to help me.
my entire life a mess i spilled it all.
not a flinch you just listened to it all.
i called you upset and in need.
concerned you asked if there was anything i need.

and thats where it all began.
you sat with me in my car as i cried and shook.
you stayed on the phone until i had spoken a book.
time and time again you where there for me.
i called at 2:30 am and you answered me in my distress.

things escalated for me and got much worse.
panicked and losing it fearing id end up in a herse.
you'd drop everything to help me now.
as i progressed to get so very down.

in your backyard i shook and fell to the ground.
but you picked me up held my hand without a sound.
arm around me i leaned my head on you.
held me tight as if fearing anything id try to do.

i wanted to die and i told you many times that night.
i was so afraid of everything out of sight.
in my mind they were all around.
going to **** me take me away from this safe ground.

but i couldn't breathe with out a struggle.
instructing me to slow down we were in a huddle.
so much more scared when you left briefly.
but upon your quick return relief came.

later days came and it was you and i.
and again i thought i was going to die.
in my car we sat side by side.
i trembled and screamed and cried.

I was certain they were going to take me.
i couldn't look up i didn't want to see.
you rubbed my back said it would be okay.
im right here its alright you'd say.

again i couldn't breathe and was close to fainting.
you put your arm around me again just waiting.
brushed my hair out of my closed eyes.
now red from tears streaming down the sides.

but i panicked didn't know where to go.
i buried my head in your arms and you didn't let go.
screaming  now of fear and pain
asked where it hurt and rubbed my back once again.

i relaxed eventually and just rested my head still holding you hand.
just breathed as you brushed my hair out of my face as i began to stand.
the night i will never forget came to an end.
my broken mind and heart that you've tried to mend.

again it happened with another friend.
i her car too much to comprehend.
you took mu pulse afraid for my life.
made me get out of the car in the middle of the night.

i couldn't stand on my own.
she held me up just a bag of bones.
you walked of to pray
not knowing what to say.

you've left your mark on my life and i dont know how im going to live without you in it.
but i cant get rid of these memories and i cant stand to not be with you the rest of my life.
i need you. but you clearly dont want me. i dont know what to do but hopefully drink you away.