I have looked for your eyes in everyone I have slept with
since you left. I have looked for your smile in the barista who makes my coffee every morning and have looked for your voice with every switch of the radio. I tried to make you the villain in our story. The truth of it was I thought I was happy with you, I thought the pain of you walking out the door would kill me. That last good bye replayed in my mind like the movies playing on my tv as background noise. I wonder where I went wrong. What were my mistakes? Why wasn’t I enough? I tried to make myself someone you liked, I spent so much time trying to make you happy, I forgot who I was.
After the fog cleared, I was able to spend time with myself.
I stopped looking for you in every person I met. For the first time, I was able to remember what it was like to breathe and move forward. In the end, I was finally happy with me.