What horrible emotion will I feel?
Anger--I'm being accused of doing something
I'm not doing, never intended to do.
was trying to do the exact opposite of,
and have been identified as a saboteur...
inspiring students to take hard classes
my students wanted to strive but were
turned back...I had committed a crime
Jealousy, my X boss, now at last
walking with the new English department diva
a woman, as spicy as white bread
as electrifying as a jello mold and they walk
along so contentedly, old friends down a tree lined path
through the quad and the blistering sun
and I've been raged at for making a joke about meetings,
a reference to a "Annie Hall" where Hollywood types have meetings for the sake
of more meetings and there is an end note: he gives good meeting
which is the goal...a mobius strip of meetings...around and around we go
treading the meeting notes like water filled with little packing crate styrofoam
making the noise of important work, the movement of it,
but in the end, creating nothing
and...now it's over and what will life be like without this dread
I feel like I can read five books in a day, run twenty miles and
cook a three course vegan meal for five and it would be less stress than
what I've just emerged from.