To look in the mirror:
What am I
That somebody would want?
Everything.
Ah,
But that's the thing, now,
Isn't it?
Everything
Is much more
Than anybody ever wants.

The way I see the world, darling,
Exalts it.
Celebrates
The blush of the sun as it rises
The hush of a summer night
The brutality of a frozen river
Stopped still in the moment of its fleeing.
Rejoices
The curve of a woman's collarbone
And the slant of her eyes when she's bleary and tired.

I live like the next time I shut my eyes
They will never again open.
Like I must soak up every moment
As if time will end once it is finished.

I am so sorry, World.
I see this life with such wonder that it makes me alone
For when the magnifying glass of my gaze
Slides along your cheek with its searing blade
It leaves a scar on all the loveliness it so admires
And blackens a line
Like charcoal
Across all the perfection it craves.
And I am ashamed!

I said it to her, in the quiet darkness that night I broke and fell to her feet like bitter rain.
But I think she thought I just meant that moment.
I meant
All
Moments.
I am ashamed to love the world as I do.
I am deeply, deeply sad that I cannot stop.
Scared, and sad.
What a shame I feel,
And what a shame I feel it.

Somewhere along the line,
The callous society in which I live
Taught me shame
Chagrin
And humiliation

*That I could look at somebody
And love them just for being.