why are you having anxiety? aren't you contented with your life? i mean, you're doing well financially, academically and nearly all other aspects in life. i just couldn't get it, why are you still having anxiety?

I'm doing well. better than some, quite like most and closely behind a few. but still, I'm having these anxieties.

because I'm raised to be better than everyone else, or to be at least at par, but never worse. if everyone is taking two steps forward, i should only be taking either two or three steps forward, but never one. because I'm not raised to be left behind.

i am raised with expectations, a whole lot of them. i am expected to be better. i am expected to be the best, one that they could boast to their friends about. i am expected to not be a failure, a defect.

i am expected to reach their expectations. this specific results in exam, this specific univ to attend and this specific career to choose.

so tell me, how could i live without these **** anxieties, when i have so much expectations on my back alone ?