Well.

Almost a year anyway.

I'm not quite sure if my mental strength is eclipsed by the sheer exhaustion just merely existing and trudging day by day.

I'm tired of these circles.

I step out of one to get swallowed by a bigger one each time.

Here I find myself retreating physically into smaller and smaller spaces, my mind growing too big for its own good.

How does it feel to have patterns traced on your flesh, never realising that the more you push

The more you slip

You spin around in patterns in a frozen monument to your failures

These numbers and figures didn't speak as loud as my heart.

Everyone's at my back, pushing me forward.

It's true what I heard then.

I can't be left alone.

This will happen again and again.

The flesh remembered the skin being tugged away

The mind remembered disarray

The soul going back to a long winter


Pull me back to land.