I am breathing the same air just like everyone else but am I still alive? The amount of stress that this life brings to me is just like an avalanche,it keeps on falling down with no plans of slowing down. I am living on the same planet just like everyone else but am I still alive? The level of anxiety that I have cannot be measured, it looks like a never ending flow of water down the stream I am laughing,smiling,cracking up some corny *** jokes,but am I still alive? Every morning I wake up, I need to put my happy mask on so they can't see the pain, the agony that I am going through. But once the day is done, I am all alone in my room, dealing with my own demons, fighting this death-in my-head situation. I have a job and have a decent amount of salary and was able to put up some food on the table just like everyone else but am I still alive? I wake up early,put on some nice semi-formal clothes, wear some branded shoes, put on some bling but am I still alive? I have been eaten alive by the demons inside my head, the thoughts of being dead still lingers in my brain each and every day. The thoughts of me being a burden to the people that I love in my life still stays for a very long time now. Maybe I'm alive,maybe I'm not. Maybe I'm already dead, maybe I'm just a spirit that's living in someone else's life. Maybe I deserve to be here,maybe I'm not Maybe I deserve to exist or maybe everything will be alright if I disappear,forever. Maybe I am alive who is just waiting that death comes sooner so that he could take me with him.