Before I knew you
the buzz of a motorcycle
never made me shiver

Before we met
guys in black
never turned my head

Before I saw you
I was slowly falling
for the sweet kind of boy
who was falling for this guarded girl

Before you texted me
I didn’t know that obsession
could feel like a sarcastic comment
and sweaty palms, and jealousy

Before you opened your mouth
the skin on the back of my neck tingled,
I felt like a beaten dog before you even
knew you held the whip

Before you complimented my ***
I thought I looked about as ****
as everyone’s kid sister,
or cousin, or little neighbor girl

Before you asked to be “friends”
I didn’t realize benefits
could actually scare the **** out of me
and that a fantasy might come true

Before we talked in my room
I didn’t realize how tense
I really was
and just how blunt I could be

Before you asked “Wanna hang out later?”
I didn’t see that it was my body
and that you weren’t trying to control
just offering fun

Before you turned on the blue Christmas lights
I didn’t have a clue what mood lighting was
how it could highlight your skin
darken your eyes
soften every inch of fabric

Before you said “Come over here”
I didn’t think that line was ****
because that’s how my ex
asked for a kiss

Even before you told me you were kidding
when you said “Okay, now leave”
I knew you were going to walk back
and kiss me again.