I feel like you just dropped me
And I was so afraid
Of the winds friction against me
Of my stomach flipping
Of the things behind me
That my eyes were misting,
Afraid to hurt as I hurdled
As all my weight
Gave gravity leverage over me.
I know what its like to gather
Fractured pieces of your essence
To have your dreams pool at your feet
While you bleed abandonment.
I want to find you I seek
Your face and that sense
Of naivety
Your safety always gave me.
You provided stability to hope,
You fueled my dreams,
You made me believe
I was worth something.
Your eyes will be the last I see
On impact
Your laugh will echo in
All my bad dreams to come undone to.
I’m done playing this game with you.
And it hurts to smash face first
Onto frozen dirt.
But I’m a lot harder now
My hallow chest falls slower
This person I have become
You’ll never really know her.
She doesn’t fracture at the thought
Of your next abandonment
She doesn't hurt anymore
As a means of self punishment.
I promise, here watch me step off the edge
It’s not enough to want me.
Part of me is still dead or dying
Over all those things you said.  
My heart bleeds and my head
Swirls with all these lessons you have taught me.