you would think by now i would get it.
that history repeats itself.
and this this isn't going to change
anytime soon.

i bring it upon myself this pain
i let myself forget what its like to hurt
only to feel it stronger each time.

its as if im climbing a wall
every now and then i get a boost up
and then suddenly and strikingly i fall back
back farther beneath where i started.

ive been knocked down too many times
i dont want to stand back up.
for fear that i will just be shoved back down again and again and again...

im done
i give in.
i quit