Apr 2013
It was a struggle.
My body’s natural reaction to heartbreak, tears flooded my eyes, making it impossible to see what was right in front of me, but when the tears cleared and my vision was refined, I saw I wasn't the only one hurting. It was a struggle. But life was moving forward and I couldn't be left in the dust. Now I seemed fine, good even. But only I knew the conflict constantly streaming through my mind. It was an epic combat between my need to curl up in a ball and hide from the world and my egotistical want to put on a strong front. Eventually, after many battles between the two, I was okay again, just okay. My personality had adapted to deal with the pain, and now I was strong enough to leave the memories behind.
The memories were repressed, but the feelings never left.
All of those memories I had pushed to the back of my heart snapped back into place the second you kissed me. It felt like my life had been just a fraction of an inch off track and you made it slip right back into place. You always did have that effect on me. I was expecting for things to go back to the way they were but to my surprise, things were exceeding my expectations. Years had passed and we both changed, but the things that really mattered were indistinguishable. My love never faltered, even when the animosity seemed overwhelming. I knew hoped someday you would come back to me.
Now we can start our life together. The perfect cadence we seem to be in gives me tremendous hope that we will make “forever” look meager. This is what we both want, to live a life completely repleted with affection and lust, and I am determined to make it happen. I’ve never been so confident in a feeling; this is all such a new feeling. Having you by my side will make my life completely whole. A family, a home, filled to the brim with happiness and joy.
Perfection.
March 29, 2013
1 year,
3 months,
6 days,
19 hours,
2 seconds.
My body’s natural reaction to heartbreak, tears flooded my eyes, making it impossible to see what was right in front of me, but when the tears cleared and my vision was refined, I saw I wasn't the only one hurting. It was a struggle. But life was moving forward and I couldn't be left in the dust. Now I seemed fine, good even. But only I knew the conflict constantly streaming through my mind. It was an epic combat between my need to curl up in a ball and hide from the world and my egotistical want to put on a strong front. Eventually, after many battles between the two, I was okay again, just okay. My personality had adapted to deal with the pain, and now I was strong enough to leave the memories behind.
The memories were repressed, but the feelings never left.
All of those memories I had pushed to the back of my heart snapped back into place the second you kissed me. It felt like my life had been just a fraction of an inch off track and you made it slip right back into place. You always did have that effect on me. I was expecting for things to go back to the way they were but to my surprise, things were exceeding my expectations. Years had passed and we both changed, but the things that really mattered were indistinguishable. My love never faltered, even when the animosity seemed overwhelming. I knew hoped someday you would come back to me.
Now we can start our life together. The perfect cadence we seem to be in gives me tremendous hope that we will make “forever” look meager. This is what we both want, to live a life completely repleted with affection and lust, and I am determined to make it happen. I’ve never been so confident in a feeling; this is all such a new feeling. Having you by my side will make my life completely whole. A family, a home, filled to the brim with happiness and joy.
Perfection.
March 29, 2013
1 year,
3 months,
6 days,
19 hours,
2 seconds.
