when did you decide that it was okay for a seven-year-old to mistake ***** for water?
when did you decide that's how she'd have her first taste?
when did you decide?
when did you decide it would be okay to call her "dhumer munda"?
regularly?
when did you decide she'd think it was normal?
stupid *****.
when did you decide she'd feel forced into a car with you
while you were drunk
to buy more alcohol because the other two had tried long enough to stop you
when did you decide you'd leave?
when did i decide?
when was i okay to know you were gone?
why couldn't i cry for you often?
did i miss you knowing what you did?
when did i decide there was nothing i could've done?
when do you give up?
let go?
embrace?
i'm tired.
maybe tomorrow.