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Backbone

You say I am the backbone of the family.

Not because I am the youngest,

But because I never showed my emotions.

But I think it's time to let go.

Because when she died,

I was the only one who didn't cry.

But i cried on the inside.

And, when they buried her 6 feet under,

My heart skipped 6 beats and I was choking.

Yes, it's time for me to let go of my emotions.

Because you say I am the backbone.

But, I am not strong enough to support 3 sisters,

1 brother, 2 aunts, 1 uncle, and 3 cousins with this,

Skinny backbone.

Arthritis can't help because I am still afraid to break down.

"You have always been the backbone, no matter what."

But,

I am tired of being Miss Motivation.

You are breaking me down form my,

Coccyx to my,

Sacral to my,

Lumber to my,

Thorracic and,

You're giving me Cervical Cancer.

And instead of being a backbone,

I feel more like a ligament.

Connecting your tears to her tears and,

Her tears to his tears and,

And that tears me apart.

You're swelling up my heart from all your pain and,

Right now it's about the size of a catchers mit.

I don't want to be the backbone.

I am not strong enough to suppport the whole family.

Why can't you see that you're exhausting me?

Kiaren, Kirsten, Kaye, Lloyd, Aunt Atheda,Aunt Regina,

Uncle Tony,Chris,Oliver, Aaron...

I am tired of being your backbone.

I am not that strong.

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Written by
kimani-jones
Published
May 24, 2010
Lines·Words
38·254
Notes

Copyright Kimani Jones 2010

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