and when i am lost
in that expansive sea
and all sides, walls of water surround me
threatening to overrtake me
I cower amidst the crashing
and the clamor of their voices
are all i can hear.
there is a weight in my lungs
as i cling to my raft
but i know if i slip
down is the only direction i will go.
and my eyes can hardly open
flashes of foam and darkness meet my eyelashes
as the wind slaps me with her salty tears
that she has torn away from the sea itself.
and gutteral noises claw their way out of my throat
mourning, wails of what can only be described as anguish
shudder through my entire being.
and my soul aches for you
i squeeze my eyes shut in hopes of escaping this hell
white knuckilng my driftwood raft.
being torn apart, as the waves taunt my demise.
what a peace i could meet if i were to just--
let go.
and fall beneath the chaos of the surface,
through the furious tumult of currents below.
into the glassy depths that stare out at me.
and still my delicate balance screams
dont do it.
still the thought of your peace whispers
you'll get through it.
but the walls are too high,
and a canyon of water seperates me from you
and refuses to abate.
cries of pain, swallowed by the greedy shouts of the waves.
and i am tired.
I clutch my plank once more
inhale deep,
and let go.

and fall below.