I’m running,
Trying to find a solution
Trying to leave
Trying to fight back
Until I’m knocked out.

I’m crying,
Trying to let it all out
But it keeps coming
It’s infinite.
The tears are never going to go away.

I’m looking,
Looking for a way out
Trying to warn him
Trying to find him
I’ve looked too long
I’m now blind with pain.

I’m screaming,
I’m screaming for him
I am screaming for him to hold me
Screaming for him to understand
Now I’m screaming
Yet no sound is coming out.

I’m listening,
Listening for the warning
But it never came,
Listening for his voice
But all I heard was silence,
Listening for the melody of his heart
But it seems to be broken because of me,
I’m listening for a reason to stay
But I never hear it
I’m now deaf,
Only able to hear my cries and screams
That no one can.

I’m talking,
Only to hear a voice that is not mine
asking for help
But just like my screams and cries,
No one hears
I’m now out of words,
I’m talking to distract myself
I distract myself from the pain,
But each distraction is like a candle
It last for a while,
but it always runs out.

I’m searching,
For a reason to stay
Searching for him
Yet he is the one I can’t find,
Searching for a way to feel
Something other than pain again,
Searching for a way out,
Searching for a cure
So the demons will go away,
Searching for the answers
But they never show.

Searching
  Searching
    Searching
      Searching
Until I find the cure.

A small, thin metal blade
A single wave of the wand
And all the
Running,
    Looking,
           Screaming,
         Listening,
Waiting,
Searching,
Will all be over.

Just one swipe,
I want to show you;
Show you how I feel
But I feel like you’d
Leave
But I don’t think it’ll take much anymore,
Even your smile left.

Even though I try to rekindle
That small reminder I had a reason.
Gone.

I want to run, run away
Let my mothers words be true
I want to be selfish and run, run away.
So I will,
I don’t know where I’ll go
But I’ll go if it means he is safe.
Because I am the virus that is bugging him