Today the end begins
Today i end it,
I end the ongoing death by death itself
I look at the birds and i want to be free like them and since i cant borrow their wings i borrow wings from death
Well no one ever said life is compulsory
Neither is it necessary for the spirit to remain in the body
I am drowning everyday and not in water but in my own blood cause for a long time now i have been a living corpse
I feel empty, deserted and rejected and today this suicidal feeling will be perfected
And to describe my emptiness is a bit difficult,
I am tired of my heart being in constant conflict with my feel like time is no longermind
I am tired of my body bot being able to fulfill what my spirit wants
I crave love in all its wholeness
Even if it were as little as my life right now
I wish someone could breakthrough but ever rigid heart and make it right
Well love only comes to those who believe it
And right now i don't know which to believe in
To believe in faith or in love, because i have believed for 17 years now and it does not seem to get better, rather my faith is dying and love along with it
I am tired of always having my eyelashes and my tears romance
Im tired of my heart pleading to my eyes to hold those tears for just a moment longer
And my annoying belief that it will all be better
And so i look around i notice something
I no longer care about anything or anyone.
Well that's too far, i don't think i care about myself anymore.
So why don't i end it?
Why don't i begin the end?