You were my secret,
for a little while, anyway.
We would sit under that tree,
my hand cradling you
as you made my belly swell.
You made me feel at ease.

But you see my little one,
I was so **** scared. I’m only eighteen;
I didn’t have the stability for you that I should.
Still, you were mine.
I was going to protect you.
Give you everything I possibly could.

I would give my life,
I would give my soul,
just so you could have yours.
I would carry the pain of the world,
bear the markings of death,
if it meant you were at peace.

Your daddy and I weren’t ready.
You were a surprise,
oh my dear little one.
But we would have loved you,
I promise you.
You would be our little sun.

Did you have your daddy’s eyes?
Brown, loving, forever yearning.
Would they crinkle when you smile, like his?
Did you have your daddy's personality?
Mischievous, kind, confident.
Would you face the world head on, like he does?

I’m sorry baby, I’m sorry if I did something
that caused you to leave too soon.
My heart is forever broken.
It snapped into two,
Half of it wanting to stay here with your daddy,
And the other half craving the unspoken...

Do you like heaven my little one?
Is it beautiful and serene?
I hope you’re up there
playing with all the other babies
taken away too early.
I hope you’re happy, oh please hear my prayer.

I miss you.
Every day my heart screams,
grieving for who you would be.
You will always be in my thoughts.
My hands beg, again, for the feeling of you
while we sat under that tree.