not suicidal lol
by Natalie Elizabeth (Notes) on Friday, February 4, 2011 at 3:49am

plotting my own demise

waiting to be surprised

tired of all the lies

watching as he dies

you meant everything

staring at the sun

sun spots clouding my vision

red haze

fury and rage

locked in this eternal cage

anger so high i cannot gage

if looks could ******* ****

as i take the next handful of pills

thinking of you makes me ill

scraping my fist against your grill

i dont know what to think of you

holding my breath turning blue

you used to be my steadfast glue

i should have expected this

its nothing new

i love to hate

and

i hate to love

am i holding on to only wisps?

you in my mind is something ive missed

there yet unattainable

i cant count on you to remain stable

whats a girl supposed to do?

when she constantly comes unglued

due to only you?