i need to stop lying to myself if i'm going to survive.
or maybe that is how i've survived for so long.
one thing i know for sure.
is that i don't know anything.
my world is spinning again.
but maybe i do this because i am more comfortable in the spinning chaos.
might i add the lonely chaos.
i was trusting again.
you were safe.
i thought you were at least.
but i thought the others were safe too.
now i don't trust anyone.