I declare the state of poemless
Most magic fled from me
I will keep myself on this plain bread
But I can't stop thinking of the garden that was there

State of poemless, seeking pleasures
but the pleasures are gone
There is a hole
in my guts
I've been here before
but that's ****, it doesn't matter anymore

I stumble around in my head
I ****** up something I cannot really name
crashing
making noises that cloud my Sun
I was ****** up before, sure
but I had outlets, I had doors,
I was not as lost
I focused on the wrong, after finding a door
I obliterated it - like I did back then

Only the blows from God move my mouth
All I need is the clarity, where I left it at?
Reality hurts like a sore wound
Reality is the solution, but she hides

Because order is a *****
because neatness is a punishment
This mental jail won't **** me
but this time I won't fight like
I always did
It's not a matter of lose or win,
it's a matter of...discovering
of using words in a way
that they are not words anymore
of waiting for the storm
to finish, for the rain to wash
Still I feel empty, I feel not great
How could I in a state
of beautyless?
I am still a part of the sky
but my light is going dim
it hurts, it hurts, it hurts