I can feel it rising up
I can feel it becoming a part of me
A waking morning thought
And a soothing night's dream.

Too easily do I end up here
This clifftop peak of potential joy
Too simply do I jump without harness
And too simply do I fall without hope.

All it takes is a smile
A good laugh and a set of *******
Then I'm drawn in  like a dead fish
In the proverbial toilet bowl

It's funny how often I jump
How often I convince myself of reciprocation
But the truth is I'm ugly
Ugly in sight, in conversation and in company

I have a quick wit but a slow start
Silence is a majority in my life
So I choose this time to stop
To walk away before humiliation

She is beautiful, funny, happy
I'm quiet, slow and stiff
She lives with fairies in the clouds
I live with worms in the dirt

So I shall stay here and live
Avoid public announcements and actions
Avoid the weening possibility of joy
For the reality of loneliness

At least here I'm safe