Jesus performed miracles out of sheer boredom
He turned water to wine and became a furious alcoholic
His dad tried to intervene

Prometheus carefully thought of strange and calming memories
His hair and beard quickly became a hindrance to his comfort and to the spectacular view in front of him
He began to resent the stench of his endlessly exposed armpits
He was never quite secure with his ****** being on display
He was a grower, not a shower