I have been living here for years
quietly
gently
in the cage of my own dysfunction

I have let the soft abrasion
of how we think
slough off the edges
of myself

the me I did not have the strength
to scaffold on my own

the me I did not want the responsibility
of defending from the world

so now,
I will not tell you the cage door is open

I will draw your attention to
the bars
and roof
and floor

to how calmly I hold fast to my perch

but I feel the open space

I feel the air come in and
I can taste
who I am
on my skin

and it brings me joy
and pain

because this is beautiful
and maybe, I am beautiful

but I cannot share this with you
yet
maybe, ever

because if all you see is what is not the same
then it will feel less

I will feel less

and I need to see the whole of me
to see all of me through my own eyes