i wish the love filled in my heart was enough
to save you from your quick demise
that i could steal back the light from your eyes
for now they hold only a reflection
instead of a deep-set understanding

i wish i could replace you
so you were here and i was not
i failed to protect you
and that is all i ever promised
i am sorry, i wish you knew
i wish i had been there often
more often than i was
my life should not have gone so far from you
know that everyday apart from you breaks my heart
and now everyday that you are gone
i feel you slipping from me

i am left with happy memories and a crippling dream
it takes everything that i have not to go to you
and lay where i saw you last
sometimes the urge is so strong
that i have to barricade myself in my room
surrounded by your belongings
i can never go back to that spot
for i know i could never leave once i found you again

i cannot erase you, that look
so terrified until you became aware of me
thank-you for trusting me
for loving me for who i am
you always saw the truth behind sad eyes
and a happy smile
i wish i could hold you, just once
see your for one moment
run my hand through your mane
i can smell you when i am lonely
although my clothes are clean of you
as if my heart bottled a piece of your essence
to open when i need you most

rest gently
i will never lose sight of you