my life cannot be read
another day of dread
the sun setting
the room turns a muted red
the cigarette smoke disappears that it as shed
i wrap myself with the bedspread
silence
as though everything is dead
there is nothing looking ahead
i am laying in bed
on one side
the other side
empty
where i have cried
from the pain inside
i am laying in bed
at the head
an empty space
with no face
no embrace
something out of place
never to be replaced
by God's grace
i am laying in bed
with the memories
of the love of my life
who now is dead
i am laying in bed
i try
i try
i cry
i look up toward the sky
i cannot
i will not
say
goodbye