I’m thinking about Joni Mitchel’s River How in the midst of Describing her lonely stale Christmas She breaks out with “I made my baby cry” And of Hemingway In The Sun Also Rises Describing the night, the bar, The scene and then says “and with them was Brett” I’m drunk and I’m thinking too much and Aching for Something to stop me on my heels, my pupils wide My obsession burning on my lips It’s my first day of school tomorrow I’m scared of mediocrity So I’m drinking hard tonight to make Sure it never gets to me My heart will always sing Let it be blue Let it be dark But it shall sing I’m smoking cigarettes like I have no due date Give me a thing to make a mess of, life. I’m bored and begging. I want The wild heart searching like a lioness in the Heat of the savannah night I want my nails dug deep into it I want it to squeal Life, give me something to Make a mess of It doesn’t have to be this way But it is The clock ticking Towards midnight Like a knife On my skin Give me something right And I’ll make a Mess of it tonight.