This is low energy happiness
This is mush smile
This is killing time
I am hurting myself
to stay alive
Where's the fever I felt?
Gone astray - I cry
I am not real anymore

I remember these days
in a hurtful sun
Made of bricks and lost dreams
While not aware of it
Who rot them?

His voice is the only ray of light
His beauty pervades it all - my **** angel
I can't reach it - it's at hand but my hand
slips
my brain - twitch, twitch

I am happy but something's amiss
it is the hole left by your kiss
or the struggle and the bliss

Will I have to live a life on hugs?
I've already been there - it doesn't pay off
While yearning for the true love -
I am in the other side of my brain
how can I get out?

I know more than I did
but still as lost as I've been
I think

Dead inside - but with a smile