May 2019
10 things you should know.
1. I am broken
2. But that broken doesn’t mean I am incapable or inadequate.
3. I am tough as nails; I don’t need anyone or anything.
4. In a more real sense # 3 is all lies it’s horseshit and I am aware of that but no one else needs to know that, I am tough but I am not infallible.
5. I fly by the seat of my pants unless I don’t and then then I’m so obsessive just get outta the way. Because in a very real sense I may run you over.
6. I’m quiet, but some days I am so quiet it can be deafening. And I am aware of how the silence can completely unhinge some people.
7. I will fight for you with such force no one will ever get to you, but I’ll never expect the same in return. And I know that this alone can irritate anyone, and even hurt them and insult them, but I can’t help it.
8. I don’t trust easy. And I won’t trust without 100% faith in them. And that faith comes with a price; I have minimal friendships or connections because of it.
9. I love fast and I love hard without walls, but I won’t tell you or express it well, I am really bad at that. I am aware of how bad I am at showing how much I care, but I think I do it subconsciously to protect myself, my pride in case they don’t love back.
10. I try. Every day I try to do better and try to be better. And I will try harder every day to be the best that I can be. And I know that leaves sometimes too much room for feeling inadequate, and never enough, but I also know I’ll always keep trying to be enough.
1. I am broken
2. But that broken doesn’t mean I am incapable or inadequate.
3. I am tough as nails; I don’t need anyone or anything.
4. In a more real sense # 3 is all lies it’s horseshit and I am aware of that but no one else needs to know that, I am tough but I am not infallible.
5. I fly by the seat of my pants unless I don’t and then then I’m so obsessive just get outta the way. Because in a very real sense I may run you over.
6. I’m quiet, but some days I am so quiet it can be deafening. And I am aware of how the silence can completely unhinge some people.
7. I will fight for you with such force no one will ever get to you, but I’ll never expect the same in return. And I know that this alone can irritate anyone, and even hurt them and insult them, but I can’t help it.
8. I don’t trust easy. And I won’t trust without 100% faith in them. And that faith comes with a price; I have minimal friendships or connections because of it.
9. I love fast and I love hard without walls, but I won’t tell you or express it well, I am really bad at that. I am aware of how bad I am at showing how much I care, but I think I do it subconsciously to protect myself, my pride in case they don’t love back.
10. I try. Every day I try to do better and try to be better. And I will try harder every day to be the best that I can be. And I know that leaves sometimes too much room for feeling inadequate, and never enough, but I also know I’ll always keep trying to be enough.
