I never called her by name
In fact,
the last time I said 'darling' to her face
was 10 nameless years ago
when I misused her
like a habit;
And now I can't even remember how
her ***** looked like,
although it was the centre of my concern,
and her ******* are now bereft
of that exclusive bounce,
as perfect as they were...
I just about recall her stomach,
I see it now as an inverted bathtub..
After three years of haughty pull-outs
I got pregnant
at a 5-star hotel in Turkey;
there wasn't much discussion,
the first adult decision that came my way
felt formal,
It did trouble me a little how dry
and ready
was her 'No.'
It felt like luck that I concurred;
And though I keep forgetting more and more
I can't forgive her
for not being delusional enough in my regard
the same way that I am now of her,
for she spoke like a fish
and she ****** like a log,
but still she clogs my veins
and reigns over my sleep.