i’ve denied it for as long as i can the day of green and gold when we met our demise almost 5 months to the day it’s irony at it’s finest, for i found anything but luck i’ve refused it for as long as i can stand there are some things i have no choice but to admit the truth is unaffected by trivial time much might not make sense, it is true but this means not that the curious is unreal almost 5 months to the day i can count on one hand the tears i have shed yet still tonight i let slip one more though rarely i feel despondent that too can sometimes slip generally i have learned to feel like your presence, well, like it brought my life hope i know now the immensity i am capable of feeling and will further refuse to settle i have tried to replace your fleeting spot in my life but have soon learned that this cannot be yet i cannot help but hope, maybe, one day one day i can find someone who can make me feel as you once did . for i am ever searching .
i wonder what you would say, if you knew how often you still cross my mind how often i still write about you it never seemed to phase you, that you were my muse . you’re still so beautiful to me, though no longer mine, you are still my own, personal disaster . i wish you nothing but happiness, and i hope one day i shall find my own without you . and here, i will say it, just one time, i will finally admit what i refused to ever speak, i loved you, and you will take with you a piece of my heart. willingly so, you changed my life. thank you for the proof, that someone like you exists, and could ever find interest in someone, not like me, but in me. for 3 months i felt more beautiful than ever in my life combined. thank you.