How did I get this way?
I wonder
With my footprints scattered
Across the sea

And suddenly I hate this world
For hating me

Such a strong word,
Hate
And I wonder

Does saying a strong word
A thousand times over
Make it any weaker?

Can I disarm a language?
Dissect the letters with my tongue?

How did I get this way?
I wonder
With weights on my lungs
And smoke in my flesh

The world is rotting away
Can't they see it?
Can't they?

I've got handprints on the stars
Cut up like thanksgiving turkeys

I'm not asking you to understand
I'm not asking you to listen at all
I'm just asking you
To open your eyes.

Question everything, please.
Even this statement.

Even me.
Even you.

We are floating along
In the middle of infinite time and space
And you want me
To justify my existence
Just like that?

Just like that?

What if I can't?
What then?

What now?


Truth be told,
Most days I feel like all that I'm really doing
Is just waiting to die.