I can deal with aging
don’t mind how it slows you down
Even as if
Every step could be your last.

As an aside, while driving
How many truths are revealed
In the mind field concealed
As your driving

Passing an old man with a cane
Who stopped to spit on the sidewalk
Don’t judge, I tell myself,
Sometimes, if I’m being truthful
I hate aging and the aged
Present company included

And that is why Jane Fonda is my hero

Who really knows what goes on in anyone’s mind
I think while I’m driving.

My friend has early Alzheimer’s
Can’t even spell the word
So I think I’ll text her a joke today
I think better of it
My joke goes like this
Maybe you’ve heard it.
Betty White said it.
“My mother always said.
You don’t get older.
You just get better.
Unless, of course, you’re a banana”
Ha, ha
Yeah, then I think
Is it possible she’ll think
I’m calling her a banana.
Makes me wonder
Would I ever call anyone a banana
I don’t know
Maybe, if it fits
Could I be accused of yellow journalism
By some banana loving lunatic
Who thinks I’m sick, sick, sick

I had an ex-mother-in-law
Who passed over a while ago
While she was here
The very epitome of decorum
If it were a different age
She wouldn’t have married
She’d be home at nine
Do what your told, behave
See where I’m going
So proper, so refined
So tell me why
At the end of her life
She spewed the most egregious slurs
To make the most prudent
Sunday school teacher blush.
Maybe she was a secret lush.

What pretty dirt
Is swept under that
Pretty Persian rug
What silk coat does righteousness wear
I swear
What does purity dismiss

And that’s why Jane Fonda is my hero
Will somebody please turn up the heat
It’s like subzero
In here.