i can't ******* sleep • who you were to me is etched in my brain somehow, played on repeat • how did you do this to me? how is your grip so ******* tight? i can't even run away and there's nowhere for me to hide • i worry too much because there's no control • how did you take so much of my soul? you just ran with it like it was nothing • you cut me down like i meant nothing • all those words and your touch like an open flame on my skin burning scars into me that will never heal, and i'll never be the same again • it's so devastating to think about it all being made up • the "fairy tale" we had was real life • you're just so jaded and cynical from pain you endured, and it made it impossible for you to let me love the broken parts • (let me love you) • i swore it wouldn't have been a waste, but you are convinced that i will always be the same • you never gave me a chance and i never gave you a reason not to believe in me • i feel like that hurts worse • i hate that you made me question every move i made and i hate having to constantly prove that my intentions are pure • i wasn't the one who hurt you • i didn't deserve the knives you stabbed straight through my heart with words you could only say when we were far apart • i will say it again so it sinks into your brain: "i bet you could never say that to my face" • (i miss you in volumes i will never speak aloud) • as if speaking it into existence will give you back the power • i don't think this is fair • we could have had it all • quit letting your thoughts build up and take away your miracles • you know **** well this didn't happen by mistake • how many more dreams are you going to let your fear and pride take?