Deep, dark, thick tar on my heart.
I drink water to wash it away,
Yet it clings like sticky stubbornness.
I pray to rid myself of it, but it knows my name and will not leave.
It whispers to me when I long for stillness.
It is elusive when I search for it to cut it out.

It knows me and yet I cannot name it.
We are familiar, but it controls.
Like a parasite, it feeds.
It bites at me- provoking, leaving little marks.

Am I not able to be cured from this heaviness?
Was I brought to this earth with a shadow in me?
I do not know how to dress with this, and present myself.
It is prickly and I poke at others out of frustration.
How is this Lightness?
I can’t let a ****** thing go.