I know that this won’t reach you. I know that you’ll never read the way I feel and never listen. But I’m gonna write it anyway. I’m not stupid, I’m not crazy, I’m not mental. My lack of ability to deal with **** is not all my fault. I love you mum, I love you dad, but being a pawn is that sick and twisted relationship that you keep “for me” isn’t healthy. **** it. I always thought that I was selfish. Then I stepped back and looked at the world. I always thought that my life was normal. Some of the **** I went through haunts me and you’ll never get that. I was a little girl and now I don’t know what I am. You made me lose myself because I was too busy trying to find you. I think the hardest thing is that I still try for you. When it dosent mean anything when my words are just  wasted air to you.