In a world full of people
I feel so alone
I am so withdrawn
From reality, i don't
Know what's real anymore
It's like I'm in the middle
Of a crowd
And I'm drowning
But no none notices as
I'm battling and struggling
To breathe
Gasping and flapping
Shouting for help
But only a squeak comes
Out
My screams get trapped
Within my throat
I'm tightly strapped
Not with ropes
But thoughts
My mind clouded
I can't remain afloat.
I heard them say i should
Talk.
That it'll help repair what
Broke
But I'm not broke no more
I'm passed broken
Like fragments of glass
I'm shattered beyond repair
I'm a ghost with no reckon
My purpose i fail to fathom
My life just turned to a phantom
Tired and exhausted
Weary and forsaken
I can't count how many times
I've contemplated to die
I hate hope
It's the most elusive of all
Always encouraging
Only to break me more
I have no seen wounds
But I'm always sore
I didn't ask to grow
I didn't apply to be born
I didn't choose to be a bore
Why then do i always feel so low
So alone
I misspelled the word enthusiasm
Now I'm no longer enthusiastic
To enthuse
But I'm always eager
To know what tomorrow would hold
That's what keeps me strong
Maybe not for long....

Akwana Wa Odera
@therealakwana
© 2018