Lately I find
There’s nothing to write about.
Because for once in my life
When I lay my head down to rest
I regret nothing.

I remember those poor decisions
I made as a naïve young girl
And I recall those moments
I wish I could have back.
But I see clarity
And have stopped blaming the cosmos
For when bad things happen to good people.

I am instead thinking
as I fall asleep
How thankful I am
for the loving people around me
(and across an ocean)
And for not being so ******* up
That I'd forget that fact.

I am proud
Of where life has led me
And the hard work it took
Just to get here.
And I am excited
For the prospect of a new journey
where all of those bad decisions
have no effect.
And just maybe,
Oh maybe.
I’ll get my happy ending.