Dec 2018
It’s there when you find yourself in panic, wandering alone in the middle of the night for a glass of water.
It’s there when you find yourself facing your living room, silent and dark.
It’s looking back to you, as you quickly run up the steps and close your bedroom door in fear that it will follow you.
It’s there when you’re laying in bed and a feeling of regret comes within. The feeling gathered from all of your misfortunes in life and you wondering why you feel this way.
You wondering why you feel so helpless, a sour feeling in the pit of your chest.
You wondering why no one else can see the struggle you bring when you face others.
You worrying yourself over one life, your life, in which brings you to tears and the world feels as if it is closing in on you.
It’s in the darkest corner of your bedroom.
A cloud of dark horror that you cannot distinguish.
You believe it to be a black hallucination as the cloud nauseates in its place.
It’s there in your classroom.
A dull, lifeless thought fighting its way into the back of your mind.
It’s hovering over you, as you contemplate whether or not you should speak.
Whether or not you should gather your things, stand up, and get out.
It’s there for you when you get out.
It’s there for you when the pressure in your chest is aching so heavily and the noises downstairs don’t seem to quiet down.
It’s there when the voices from the outside are not enough to overpower the voices in your mind telling you to listen to them tell you that you will need to cover your eyes and not pay attention to it.
It’s there for you when you need to swallow away the voices in your mind so you can focus on their voices rather than listen to your own.
It’s there for you when you swallow away the voices in which they told you to avoid.
It’s watching you as you lay your head on your pillow and shift your head to meet it directly.
It’s watching you as you watch their faces appear in confusion and guilt, as all the timing in your world comes to a close.
It’s watching you shut your eyes.
It’s watching you, but you wouldn’t know.
It’s there when you find yourself facing your living room, silent and dark.
It’s looking back to you, as you quickly run up the steps and close your bedroom door in fear that it will follow you.
It’s there when you’re laying in bed and a feeling of regret comes within. The feeling gathered from all of your misfortunes in life and you wondering why you feel this way.
You wondering why you feel so helpless, a sour feeling in the pit of your chest.
You wondering why no one else can see the struggle you bring when you face others.
You worrying yourself over one life, your life, in which brings you to tears and the world feels as if it is closing in on you.
It’s in the darkest corner of your bedroom.
A cloud of dark horror that you cannot distinguish.
You believe it to be a black hallucination as the cloud nauseates in its place.
It’s there in your classroom.
A dull, lifeless thought fighting its way into the back of your mind.
It’s hovering over you, as you contemplate whether or not you should speak.
Whether or not you should gather your things, stand up, and get out.
It’s there for you when you get out.
It’s there for you when the pressure in your chest is aching so heavily and the noises downstairs don’t seem to quiet down.
It’s there when the voices from the outside are not enough to overpower the voices in your mind telling you to listen to them tell you that you will need to cover your eyes and not pay attention to it.
It’s there for you when you need to swallow away the voices in your mind so you can focus on their voices rather than listen to your own.
It’s there for you when you swallow away the voices in which they told you to avoid.
It’s watching you as you lay your head on your pillow and shift your head to meet it directly.
It’s watching you as you watch their faces appear in confusion and guilt, as all the timing in your world comes to a close.
It’s watching you shut your eyes.
It’s watching you, but you wouldn’t know.
