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The Antics Of A Would Be Mama's Yoyo Thief

(now a penchant with less Zionist trenchant ululation to vent.) Not a peep passed thru mine - aye vaguely attest what ten? eleven? twelve? age of following anecdote at best guest, but no doubt yours truly with figurative heart in chest scared puny meek boy tight lipped silently confessed to foiled attempt, sans trying unsuccessfully to steal a yoyo, inviting tummy prepubescent unbuttoning, a substantially sprawling Holy skype sizing breast of mine upon be nabbed, thus aye didst detest foolish kid ploy, and (prematurely nipping in the bud) messed up potential life of crime with first and only shoplifting heist jest for getting caught no a pest key yoyo, mama would (IF FOUND OUT) axe me no quest chin, but whack me itty bitty teensy weensy derriere lest quickly putting to rest any Robin Hood fantasy life of high stakes crime pressed, and squeezed out the noggin with apropos punishment addressed thankfully, neither parent got wind, nor ever guessed their beautiful darling boy did test petty theft, never matured nor didst crest into a profitable "yoyo string Ponzi like scheme," thus ballsiest dare devilish and bitterest, and laughably noble lest act yours truly ever attempted immediately ceased to shelve bravest sleight of hand find delve during broad est daylight, I immediately didst shelve, when clumsiest initial foray into the world wide web tubby come cleverest lad, this side of Lansdale, Pennsylvania many damnedest yesterdays ago, never took another earnest tempting gamble since security detail nearly wrest head possible zapped feeblest Ames? to pilfer from other Department stores if pressed for money no matter, I might miss an enforced hated ballet class, with abs salute zest!
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Written by
matthew-scott-harris2p
66 / M / schwenksville, penna
Published
Dec 13, 2018
Lines·Words
77·275
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