I want to approach it, but it will **** us again.
I can't risk that; you're my everything.
I crossed the threshold; I did it to be brave
Now I'm burning on the fire, I am in pain.

And I had a vision today
Of the doors of hell
Maybe all you have to do is to look away
because else it keeps staring at you straight
And the word fakeness, the idea
chases me. I feel a restlessness in me
no matter what I do, say, or feel.

I simply can't go back
to my phobic reactions
To neglecting my own directions.
I remember how it all was
when I was 16 and younger (still young)
It kills me inside: I want what I want
your love
But there's a hole, in my soul
Did I open it with my hands
Did it open itself like that

But I love you, so deep.
This is my curse. This is my gift.
Visions please do not leave me
take me back - show me the real
A flower shows its head - caress her