.hell... what perfect antithesis of how woman perceive *** as an ancestral "past-time" of chasing & hunting... what... with female genitals? how about i farm oysters?! one song comes to mind, to give this piece overtones... chris rea... stainsby girls...

****... and there i was thinking that
i coined the phrase...
voluntary celibacy...
    well... there was that one time
i picked up a Thai bisexual
in the park, took her home,
played her some Miles Davis,
and later ****** her in the garden...
or my diet of... two *****
with prostitutes per year...
and i'm fine with that...
but i was worried with the Thai
bisexual... i actually did think
i was going to get a Thai surprise...
what with her sports-bra...
i can't remember ever being on a date...
i never used a dating-app...
*** as much animal as random...
hard time getting an STD
with prostitutes these days...
you'd be surprised...
one told she gets her STD checks
every month...
funny, eh? that a *******
can wield so much moral
authority...
you can't spank them like
in the pornographic flicks...
i'm old school...
pictures are just fine by me...
why?
the imagination runs wild...
the urban dictionary beat me
to it, but... they would have...
i was working on the concept
since 2007...
their entry reads 2014...
how did it began?
oh... you know...
i once watched a few monks
come to your Catholic
school
and play basketball with
the kids in the playground...
and... Taizé...
that was a big game changer...
i mean:
when a **** comes knocking
on your door...
and you don't require
to peacock...
you're not exactly going
to turn it down, are you?
******* beat me to it...
in word alone...
like i said,
i've been practicing this
7 years prior
urban dictionary picked
it up...
but with prostitutes it's like:
it's an hour...
it's not a "relationship"
with all its quirks...
i'm past 30...
   you wanna marry,
marry young...
and thank **** i didn't marry
a teenage girl...
she either was pregnant,
or she faked pregnancy...
she's also ~30 now...
one engagement (moi),
a second marriage...
and i could have had a happy
marriage...
that one Farsi girl...
and that one Aussie half Indian
half Irish...
it would have been just fine...
but...
           i wouldn't have these
thoughts,
or this writing... gamble?
well... it's always a gamble...
the sort of gambling that encompasses
the stratum of mortality...
not the sort of gambling
with coinage,
the cheapest thrill...
the minor rewards...
   i gambled with life,
for the point of wondering...
will i die a death worthy,
or a death of assault by
self-inflicted kamikaze wounds?
now... if you want to gamble...
that the best gamble there is...
i wrote this...
because...
i'm still...
     not drunk enough to complete
what came prior to this...
the "poem" entitled
the cultural exchange program...
*******...
i can't believe they beat me
for the coin of phrase...
and what if i only feel like
having only two erections
a year?
   i can bypass the madonna-*****
complex...
   i'm less nostalgic about
the ***,
  and less inclined to "experiment"...
less into latex suits,
less into lost ambitions,
    less into position conundrums...
pretty much less of everything
associated with routine...
but... ******* isn't my favorite part...
homework...
steal a kiss from a *******...
go on...
no... wait...
1, 2... 3... try stealing kisses from
4...
            one with giggles,
   one with closed eyes
having kissed her eyelids prior...
one with tears...
   and one... god... that last one...
not having trimmed my ***** hair...
just enjoying a classic Hollywood
kiss of prolonging the touching
of lips, no tongue, no slobbering...
with her leg rapping around
my torso...
                     apparently i was being
"nice"? i was momentarily
suffering from a gender dysphoria...
remembering i was once cleaned
shaved, and donning long hair...
believe me... short hair, and a Moses beard?
- and i was thinking i was a woman,
well... i wasn't thinking,
i was "thinking"...
**** shame i didn't trim my burning
bush of *****.