I wanna sit down

and be quite and get to know myself

in silence,

it's hard to do that

i've sat on park benches and tried to understand others, by observing them,

movements, strides, clothing, shapes, skin color and all

but not myself, that's a lot easier to do, and still impossible

but...

but

to know myself, that takes time and silence

and I'm addicted to alllll this stuff,

sights, sound and noise coming at me

and work... those 40 hours...that paycheck

if I was brave I would quit it alllll

and go towards the isolation road

but I don't

the world has me in her clutches

and rides me as she pleases

and I forget it all, like a lap dance