it only requires about two drinks to get
through the internet alt. media
commentators...
after that... my head starts to feel like
a balloon... which pops...
           and then i'm like:
       **** it... i'm not wasting ol' Jack
on this...
                evidently i'm being force fed
some sort of agenda...
and i can't waste a good bottle
of the marquees de bourbon on these
videos... total screen time?
   roughly 30 minutes...
        then i crank the volume up...
put on a decent playlist and start doing
my rhythmic nodding to a song...
sometimes turning my body into
a drumming machine...
   and...
        look out the window...
mesmerized by the horizon...
the line of trees of the forest i sometimes
go into at night...
       not exactly bothered by
the distance... but looking at something
far away helps me to think,
well... "think": more like my mind
turning in a mouth that feeds on an abyss...
then onto the nearby brick walls
for... whatever reason i think is
needed to justify paying for art...
  hell... you don't want to look at a painting,
pay for it? here's a brick wall...
          again: the genius of polyester...
  how... it repels rain...
   walked out with a dry t-shirt....
   came back with a dry t-shirt...
   took a break at the bus-stop to smoke
a cigarette and finish my beer...
was honked by a white van passing by..
evidently a man did the...
            thumb pressing on the ring and
middle fingers curled,
with the index and pinky finger extended...
i was once mistook for a Richard...
      guess i must have done something
right...
   and when the music comes on?
screen time? 5 minutes over a span of
5 hours...
  to mobile phone...
no presence on any dating app.
               facebook... yeah...
but it was a university thing in the beginning...
you needed a university based
email account...
               i was...
    s0458467@sms.ed.ac.uk
    student no. 458,467...
this is how you originally could log into
facebook, set up an account...
you needed a university email...
               before the firm expanded...
how the hell was i supposed to know
that people would feel like they do,
now... about the firm's expansion,
extending to +13 age restrictions...
   at the time, 11 years ago when the website
arrived by word of mouth to
these isles... everyone was in on it...
i have to say...
                      it was a good decision
to delete my past...
         clingy... thistle...
           i'll cling to the past i chose to cling
to... and that's still about 10 really
important memories for me to keep...
the internet...
a great place to bypass editors and
publishers...
                        making videos was never
on the cards...
       the whole passive ingestion...
whereby you can do two things at once...
point being...
   you can't exactly listen to a video
commentary and listen to music...
so i chose writing...
     because you can then listen to music...
and that's far better than
making videos...
      since... i gather: music out-competes
this video commentators...
and how all the more non-intrusive
a piece of writing is...
                   plus... you don't hear my voice:
you hear your own;
and as someone once accused me of,
in terms of: liking the sound of my own voice...
not at all...
                 i'm hardly the rhetorician,
the Ciceroesque orator...
   i'm no Churchill...
                           and god forbid that i become
one... ah... ancient Rome...
                 philosophy only emerged
with Marcus Aurelius, the stoic...
   otherwise ancient Rome has no known
philosophers, only sophists,
akin to Seneca and Cicero...
   i honestly can't think of any Roman
philosopher... not one.