Last night I decided to try something.
Something I would never tell anyone.
Anyone could have done something to me.
Me I felt different, incredibly clear.

Clear sky filled with question about what is.
Is it really bad that it felt so good?
Good that I couldn’t stop myself from more?
More experience but still not enough,

enough of this pretending to be cool.
Cool, winter, nights bring me back to this life.
Life is too precious for me to waste it.
It could be so much better than it is.

Is it my fault? Or can I blame someone?
Someone to take the fall for my mistakes,
mistakes I made that can’t be taken back,
back to the days when these bad things scared me.