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Nov 2018
Well... hello there,
C'mon tell me what to do,
Give me roads that I should follow
And rules to comply to.
Tell me how I should behave
And what words to use,
Tell me how to act, to eat, to breathe
And tell me I'm no good.
Because society accepts...
What they want, what did you thought?
What they think it's manageable
And what they think won't rot.
I'm gonna listen carefully,
Nah, I am gonna obey.
I'm gonna follow every rule
Believing that you'll stay.
I am gonna make you happy,
I am gonna make you proud,
Until it brakes me
And I brake the others around!
I'm gonna comply yelling at others
So they can obey too.
I'm gonna be happy
When they will feel helpless
And I'm gonna beat them smooth.
I'm gonna run over their soul
So I can be a queen.
Nah, I am gonna be an empress
And crush everything in between!

Because that's what your scenario looks like
And **** human... it ain't right!
Life is not rules, life is not fight.
But no, please, don't listen to me!
Do your hobby and crush away
Everything you see.
I talk to myself and I love how it goes,
I love when I'm angry
And I love how myself takes away that pain,
Turns it into treasure,
And hide it's remains.
Too much time I've spent
On judging, hating, criticising
And I'm gonna let you believe
That I am better and I am cooler,
But no, I was judging the decisions
That I took without control,
Hating the consequences
That blurred my very soul,
Criticising my existence
That always seemed so long.

I am not the author of my life,
I am just orchestrating some words.
I won't tell you that I was blind,
I won't tell you that I was deaf,
I will tell you that knowing was not in depth...
I will tell you that I am myself,
And myself loves very much,
The people... and the hell
That they bring into my life.
Myself knows who I am
And myself learns who I will be
Because myself, I and me
Are gonna change and in between
I'm gonna have a break
And tell you I am clean.
I am clean of all the hatred
Because I stopped hating myself,
I start enjoying the wind and the people I kept.
I stopped feeling like nothing
Because in the end
You are the one that sets
All the roads to your aim.
And trust me and listen very carefully,
I know I told you not to listen
But this time I want you to see,
That your paths are millions
And your skills are without number
But here is the catch,
You'll only see what you're ready to see
And only will try to become what you need.
You will be fearless and loving and kind,
If only your mind will comprehend.
So don't run away pretending
That you're a king without an ending.
And don't tell me what I should do or don't
Because it's not a choice to represent myself.
It's an order from above
To cherish my being with everything involved.
Crina Banarescu
Written by
Crina Banarescu  21/F
(21/F)   
46
 
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