On train headed home
Going to be on my way to visit you
Even though I didn’t visit you much when you were healthier and living
Could this be guilt? How do you go watch someone die when you barely watched them alive?
I go because I feel bad, bad for my family that they’re going through this
That my dad has to watch his mother suffer and pass
I’m going for them.
Makes me wonder do they even need me?
Why should I go?
Am I a bad person?
I would rather go to class and do vogue
Instead of dealing with the cries because you may just die
Other people would be crying at the thought of losing you
Yet here I am ALMOST crying just because I feel bad and am frustrated.
How much does it really mean to watch one die whom you barely seen alive?