I do not love

I don’t even like the girls I sleep with
I just can’t sleep in an empty bed

and I do not miss you
or the way you taste

I’ve long forgotten the smell of your skin
the sound of your voice

I just miss having someone to hold
but I don’t want it to be you
do not come back here

I can’t stand the way your name sounds against my tongue
or the memories I have of you

I do not love

I didn’t even like her
just the way she told me I was better than the boys she ******

I do not love

they didn’t teach me that when I was in school
or how to feel when she leaves you

I had to figure these things out on my own
and I know I’m doing something wrong

but I do not care
I do not
I don’t

I do not love

but if I did
it would not be you