I guess I could call you too, but I won't
for fear that

I

will

CHOKE.

I will choke on the joke that was our relationship.
Or rather, relationSHIT.
Because that's what it was,
****.
****, I let you play me

over

and

over

again.

Like a broken record that skips,
I let you skip through the courtship period and straight

into

my

pants..

After one week,
because I was so weak.

So I gave you the only real thing I had left of me -

my virginity.

And now you're gone, and I don't know where you are.
All I know is that you're not far
from me,
from where you should be.
But you're not.
And you still leave me

HOT

for you.

Even after all you've put me through,

I can't help myself,
Can't stop thinking of you,
And what you have of me,
And worrying I'll never see you again.

So can't we go backwards?
Back to that day on the bus
When we were innocent strangers.

Can't we start over
and make this **** better?
Because I was actually starting to like you.
Maybe even fall for you.

But no, I don't say things like that after one week.
But, like I said, you make, or rather made, me weak.

And now I am drained.

So yes, I guess I could call you too.
But I won't.
Because I know

I

will

CHOKE

on the lie

that was "us."