Doth offer the following lacking
nope *** whet tic feet to stand
also immediately discerned tubby not so grand
repurposed poem mebbe land
ding this leftist rightly shackled hand
nonetheless trumpeting my brand
of vapid verse never in demand.

Day and night me spouse
     for countless year
     i must endure
     the shrieking call for “Matt”
that mine nickname puncturing
     sensitive left and right ear
     akin to annoying
     mosquito or buzzing gnat
impossible to eradicate
     without fan nor fare
     to destroy the entire house
     madly waving a baseball bat
only for the pestilential pest
     to mock and jeer
     futile attempt to wrest control
     and rejoice at the splat
akin to a rorschach test
     closely resembling wife i fear!