Today is just like any other day I'm barely awake The water runs as I think of everything I don't want to face I look back all the time Remembering where I've been and where I've come from My face is just a lie My heart is seeking home
My home is my roots Deep down within me I'm a soul encased in white flesh But there's a story to me
I try to behave Everyday, all I ever do is behave I remember in middle school I heard on some women's talk show That good girls don't make history I would repeat that to myself as a teen Now all I repeat is daily drudgery
I have expectations on my shoulders And I'm surrounded by white people, But I'm not like them They claw onto their intellect As if they know what suffering is Their hearts are shiny, well polished glass There is nothing in them And they easily crack No substance or meaning Beyond their roles White people, white people With white souls
But I'm from Brooklyn, does that make a difference to you? I've known suffering But not in the way some of my dark-skinned peers have suffered I was just the white girl to them in school My skin represented the source of their oppression Some subconsciously hated me I felt like a pariah, I have always felt like a pariah Clamoring to fit in
The best route to fitting in I found, was self deprecating humor And acts of senseless rebellion Or just becoming so quiet that no one would notice me Now that I'm surrounded by white people, Nothing has changed They're the type of white people who glorify knowledge I love to learn But they are straight up elitist about intelligence and education But what else can you expect from privileged white people?
My skin in some ways makes me privileged, But I also am not the type of white that comes from money My family is not the type of white that is devoid of trauma We're not the type of white who are bland, coldly intellectual, and superficial
But this poem isn't about flesh It's about being ****** an outcast Forever being misunderstood by a spectrum of people While I deeply understand every person that crosses my path No one seems to be able to understand me And *******, that's lonely.